What's This?SANTA MONICA, CA - FEBRUARY 25: Co-hosts John Mulaney (L) and Nick Kroll speak onstage during the 2017 Film Independent Spirit Awards at the Santa Monica Pier on February 25, 2017 in Santa Monica, California. (Photo by Kevork Djansezian/Getty Images for Film Independent)
Image: Getty Images for Film Independent
Nick Kroll and John Mulaney, hosts of the Independent Spirit Awards, went full-savage on Hollywood, President Donald Trump, and everything else under the California sun on Saturday. In doing so, they achieving new levels of "they did not just say that" at the one awards show that seems to re-define the limits of awards-show-season jokes every year.
The show—billed as "Hollywood's biggest afternoon"—took its first brutal swipe in the cold open, labeling Best Feature nominees Chronic, Manchester by the Sea, Moonlight, American Honey, and Jackie, respectively as: Bad Dad, Bad Dad, No Dad, No Dads and ... wait for it ... Dead Dad.
Shock, yes. Surprise? No: Kroll and Mulaney, friends and creators of The Oh, Hello Show of TV and theater fame, are not polite, to put it as mildly as possible.
To put it less mildly, here are some highlights from their scorching monologue and segments:
On Mel Gibson
"We like to think of ourselves as the awards show without Mel Gibson," Kroll said. "People wondered how long would it take Hollywood to forgive someone for anti-semitic racist hate speech? The answer? Eight years!"
Added Mulaney: "So look out for the 2024 Oscars, when the Jean Hersholt Humanitarian Award goes to Steve Bannon."
Speaking of, uh, Steve Bannon:
"The only reason he got that job is because he's so hot!" Kroll cracked. Mulaney: "Those chapped kneecaps!" Kroll: "In this country, if you're that sexy, you can get anything you want. Steve Bannon is so hot. He looks like Nick Offerman drowned."
And Bannon's boss, Donald Trump:
"Hey Trump, you and Robert Durst are both rich sociopaths from New York real estate empires, yet somehow, Robert Durst is more likable."
On the Indie Spirits, and their inevitably dominant winner 'Moonlight'
"This is your day to celebrate each other," Mulaney said. "To stroke each other off. The Spirit Awards are a secret hand-job on the beach. But enough about Moonlight."
And finally, that 'Not-in-memoriam' section
Kroll: "So many people died in 2016 that it would be more efficient to show people who haven't died."
That's when Andy Samberg, dressed poorly as Eddie Vedder, bounded onstage to sing Pearl Jam's "Alive" as he honored the living, including Hailee Steinfeld, Tim Allen, "Mattie D-Bones" (Matt Damon), Viggo Mortensen, Craig Robinson, Casey Affleck (who was not in his chair, hmmm), and Fred Armisen (who pretended to die at that moment). Samberg took a moment to send off an RIP tweet before attending to the situation.Topics: Awards, Entertainment, Movies, film-independent-spirit-awards, oscars 2017