What if you could have it all?
I'm talking about a prosperous career, a successful marriage, happy children and health. Well, you don't have to pick and choose.
You really can have your cake and eat it, too. Otherwise why have cake?
Here are the two rules I follow to have it all:
Nothing in life comes to those that don't commit to anything. There is a cost to commitment, which is time, energy and money. But it's worth it.
You have to make time with your kids a commitment first. Then make a commitment to your career, to working out and to making a great relationship with your spouse.
Commit to it all.
2. No Excuses
People who make excuses don't commit. They think about reasons why they did or didn't do something. They think they'll be happy when they get married, when they get divorced, when they get that job, when the weekend comes, when they get rich, and so on — but people who are not happy now are using excuses. They're not taking responsibility for their happiness.
If you aren't happy, it's because of you, not your circumstances. Don't make excuses for not spending time with your kids.
"If you aren't happy, it's because of you, not your circumstances."
To have it all, as contradictory as it sounds, you must cut what isn't needed. Identify what you absolutely must have, using logic not emotion — then cut out the rest.
People so often complain about a lack of time. As children get older, schedules get busier and it's easy to spend less and less time with your growing kids. I am a busy, busy man, but I still make it a priority to spend an hour of quality time each day with my daughters.
Look to spend quality time where you are fully present — this beats quantity where you are half-present and half watching TV.
Cut things out of your life that aren't necessary so you will have time for the kids.
One thing that is key is to make your marriage the main priority, even above your children. This may shock people, but it's important: Your relationship with your spouse existed before the children and will have to exist after the children move out.
You need to make time with your kids, but you must not forget to make one-on-one time with your spouse. Is it difficult to find the time? Tough — you need to make the time.
Have a conversation with your spouse today about how you and your relationship come first, even before the kids. Remember:
- All children are different and require unique parenting styles.
- Someone has to be in charge. Do the family members know who that is?
- Be on the same page.
- Don't argue in front of the kids.
To have it all is to live what I call the 10X Super Life, from my New York Times best-seller "The 10X Rule." You don't want to be average in anything. Whether it is your professional career, family life, income, physical health, spiritual life, recreational life, etc., you want all of it to be great.
How do you have a 10X life? It's about living life full of everything that's important to you.
Remember that one single human being cannot make you happy enough to fulfill dreams and goals you had before you met them. Neither can children. They can add fuel to your tank so you can get there, but if you're going in different directions you are going to have difficulties.
Find a way to work together as a family, with your spouse and kids on board with you.
If you aren't spending enough time with your kids right now, you must make the decision to commit. Make a real commitment to spend time with the kids and stop making excuses about it. The same thing holds true for working out, your business and your marriage. Make your life great in every area by committing to it and stop making excuses!
Grant Cardone is a highly successful entrepreneur, New York Times best-selling author, and sales training expert.